Happy is one who is content.

Can I cry ? Mrs Cheong gave me the two chocolate coins and fortune cookie. I literally cried when the letter she gave out said " From your dedicated teacher, Mrs Susan Cheong " it kinda aches my heart for IDK what reason. She's like my third mum. Just by looking at my facial expression, she's able to tell if I'm feeling tired or I need a break. I think I've broken down in front of everyone a few times already because I feel touched when she asks me if I'm alright. My mum sort of approved me to attend lessons at the new YMCA studio from April onwards. I feel sorta relieved now. 

Feeling kinda down right now. Screwed for ballet exams because I can't remember the dances after not dancing for 2 weeks due to fucking fever. I screwed up free movement and character and some parts of classical. I'm such a let down to myself. I study quite alot compared to my bad results and yet I get such shitty results. IDK what to do anymore. But something kinda struck me just now. Was talking to YuanPing and he just casually said " why you so hardcore got CCA already still go ballet " and that's when I realised why I've been dancing ballet too. It's because I'm pratically too dumb to do anything else. I can't study. I can't do guzheng. This is my only hope left. Please don't disappoint me further.